


Suho

by LilacBrown889



Series: Lilac's EXO One-Shots [3]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Gen, Hurt, after taoluris leave
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:55:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27117814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilacBrown889/pseuds/LilacBrown889
Summary: Suho might seem like he knows what he's doing, but Junmyeon can't keep it together in a band falling apart around him.
Series: Lilac's EXO One-Shots [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979371
Kudos: 9





	Suho

4 years after their debut, and they're finally able to own the stage. No longer do they look like kids, tiny compared to the huge stage. Even with less and less of them, they've grown enough that the stage still doesn't feel quite too empty. 

They're stronger now too. The long hours of practice and torturous schedules have hardened them. When they stood next to the tiny members of rookie group NCT Dream on their comeback encore stage, Suho had felt taller and stronger than ever. And in the bright, still-blinding lights with their fans chanting their names, Suho knew he'd be okay, that somehow he'd live through this. 

It was hard, though, every day. Tasked with being EXO-K's Leader from the very beginning was immense pressure, but with Kris's help even the combined promotions with all twelve members were manageable. It was back then when they were on good terms with each other. They had never been as close as other smaller groups seemed, but there hadn't been this constant hatred, the small petty fights leading to week-long silences. 

When Kris left, everything began to fall apart, but Suho didn't blame Kris. Kris had his own reasons for leaving; it wasn't Suho's problem to judge him. He had more pressing issues anyways, namely preparations for their first concert in addition to their usual promotions.

It had made things even harder though. With the pressure of now being leader of 11 people on only his shoulders, schedules seemed to stretch longer and longer, and rest time became nothing more than a passing fantasy.

When Luhan left, tension between the members rose. Luhan had been increasingly helpful in keeping the members together. His age and his easy going demeanor made him a favorite among the members, and his absence was a gaping hole in their group, highlighted by the fact that Kris wasn’t coming back either. That was when group meals became scarce, when spending time with the others became less fun, more of a chore. Suho tried to keep them together, forcing group meals whenever possible, but it wasn’t easy, even with Minseok and Lay (bless them) trying to help. 

And when Tao left, that was when Sehun stopped smiling. 

Sehun had been close to Suho ever since their trainee days. They had been as close as brothers, or so Suho thought. Besides, as leader Suho naturally felt protective of the maknae. Seeing him struggle to put on a smile for the fans, always shutting himself up in his room, was painful.

To try to keep the group from completely falling apart was a nightmare, and the lines of stress on Suho's face had deepened in the past two years, not that it mattered much (one thing Suho had learned was there wasn’t a stress line too deep for the makeup department to fill in with concealer). But lately he had stopped trying. It was too hard, and too detrimental to his own health to keep trying. 

And that's when Chanyeol and Baekhyun stopped talking. 

That was the final blow, when Suho stopped trying to keep his sanity and the group intact. Chanyeol and Baekhyun had been the only ones to pull through all of this mostly intact. From the start they had been closer than close, the bestest of friends, and when everyone was fighting they would be laughing together in another room. They were the only ones who, in spite of all obstacles, stuck together. For them to stop speaking, not only to each other but also to the rest of the group most of the time, was truly a representation of the dire state of things within their group.

How awful it was, to live with the very people you wished to never see again. It wasn’t that Suho hated anyone in EXO, far from it. He loved all his fellow members, but he knew they would be happier without him. It felt like their future together was empty, torn away by the members who had left.

Suho sighed, checking the calendar on his phone. Only a few more years and the contract would end. Then they would all be free. 

**Author's Note:**

> Also written in a fit of angst after watching EXO share their encore stage with NCT Dream in 2016, which I have since found in the depths of my writing folder and subsequently polished and published for your consumption. Gods, the juxtaposition of EXO as a mature, seasoned, accomplished group and NCT Dream's youth and potential. My little writer's heart couldn't resist. Please do enjoy. 
> 
> (I don't think they're actually miserable with their lives.)


End file.
